It doesn’t take much to be a parent in Sim City, the Sim City Adoption Agency, will allow anyone adopt. This was proven once again when a child was turned over to Big and Bob Foot, a gay sasquatch couple.
Bob was amazed at how easy it was for them to become parents. “All I had to do was pick up the phone and make a phone call. There was no paperwork, no background check, no home visit. I was just told that within twenty-four hours we would have a child.”
“Our new daughter is great. You would think that she would be afraid, because we are sasquatches and all, but she accepted us right off, happy to finally have a loving family. She didn’t realize right off that we were a same sex couple, all the hair really confuses things,” Big told us. “When we explained everything she didn’t seem to have a problem with it. She’s happy to be here.”
Sims through out Sim City are appalled and shocked by this turn of events. In a city known for its strangeness, you would think that this would be treated like another happening. That isn’t the case.
Bob Newbie was the first to speak on the issue. “I didn’t know that there was a gay sasquatch family living nearby! I didn’t even know sasquatches could be gay…then again, I never really thought about it.”
Tila Tequila was the most affected by the news. “I can’t believe this! Big Foot is gay?!?” She then broke down in tears. Because of a certain circulated home video, it’s no secret that Tila had a short lived relationship with Big Foot.
Bob Foot was amazed that people just assumed that all sasquatches were heterosexual. “ That was just an unfair assumption to make about sasquatches, that we would all be straight. That would be like saying all humans are straight and that there are no gay aliens. Personally, I find it odd that people would accept us for being gay before accepting us for being sasquatches, with all the negative sasquatch stereotypes out there.”
When contacted for a statement about alien sexuality all Pollination Technician Nine had to say was “Big Foot….hmmm….this has possibilities….”
2 responses so far ↓
Third Moment of the Riemann Zeta Function // May 16, 2007 at 4:30 am
The gay sasquatches might answer some of the questions on why we don’t see a lot of them around these parts anymore.
Qelqoth // May 31, 2007 at 5:27 pm
It may also explain why the Hendersons stopped paying attention to Harry after he was frequently spotted in sleazy bars with sailors, listening to disco pop.